Thursday, August 16, 2012

Stupid me.

"Why don't you go and get into your outfit?"
"Arg, do I have to, it is so hot. The outfit is pretty warm all by itself you know...."
"Oh, mh, it is pretty warm, okay, well you want to skip the spanking then?"
We finally had the house to ourselves, yeah! But it was warm, plus I don't really like when he asks, I want him to know what he wants and then make me do it.
"Mh, maybe...." No not really, I wanted to skip the outfit, but I also didn't want to tell him that I want him to want to spank me, no matter what I think about it. (Rereading that make me chuckle at us women)
"Well I will go take a shower then."
I was laying in bed, waiting, turned on, thinking that if I present my bottom, maybe he will get the idea.
Nope, he didn't. He started stroking me, I sucked his cock for along while and he patted my bottom. I kept wiggling at him, but no spanking for me.

So I guess it really is my fault. I could have had a spanking, but once again, I don't like asking for it. I want DH to know and to decide when to give me a spanking, or not. Feels more submissive to me. He is going to be annoyed with me for writing it here though, but it seems I can express myself better here, than having to explain it to him in person.

I like the picture, it seems to represent how I feel about my actions last night.

24 comments:

  1. I don't know the whole dominant/submissive thing, but like most relationships maybe you do need to tell him a little more so he can learn, and then he will learn your signals and you won't need to tell him anything he will just grab you and spank you silly without you needing to say anything.

    Just a thought. I don't know if that defeats the purpose or not, cause like I said, I don't really know the dynamics of the dominant/submissive relationship.

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    1. Yes, I know. And I agree. I have brought it up before. I don't like when he asks, if he wants to do it, then do it, but otherwise, I would like him to step up and do it.
      I don't know. Maybe I am just horrible at this too. No clue. :(

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  2. Would he maybe spank you for not telling him you want/need a spanking? (grin)

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  3. I am like you. I want the spankings, but don't want to admit I want them, because that ruins the whole point...I like Davey to just spank me, not because I want it, but because either I DESERVE it, or HE wants to do it. Then it feels like he has control, which is the sexiest part of it.
    I did explain this once in a letter to him, and fortunately he has a good memory, and things work out pretty well these days, when we are together! xxx

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    1. Exactly! To me it is the whole point: He spanks me because I deserve it or because he thinks I need it or whatever. I know I have explained it to him before, I don't know.

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  4. Ok. I have done/do this. I know exactly how you feel and what you're saying. I end up kicking myself and then having an attitude over my lost opportunity. It does get easier to ask for what you want but in truth, I'd rather not ask but have him 'do'.

    Dee x

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    1. I am so glad to hear I am not the only one doing this.

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  5. Isn't it amazing that we will not give in to get what we want. Do they know us so well that it's a game to get us to give in? Nah, they usually don't think like us and therein lies the problem.

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    1. I think he just doesn't think of it, and doesn't do it on purpose.

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  6. Yeah I just ask, but I do feel like I'm topping from the bottom. Especially when I start asking for particulars (no, I want to leave my panties on so you can pull them DOWN). but he's new to this, so how else would he know?

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    1. Exactly! I try to lean back and really let him do it (steer the boat), but sometimes it is just so frustrating for me. And I really don't want to tell him how to do it, how I imagine this dynamic.

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  7. Don't beat yourself up about it. We've ALL done it at one point or another. It's really hard to ask for anything you want, let alone something like a spanking. Part of the whole dynamic is him demanding, you submitting. Unfortunately, they're still human and we're giant puzzle rubics cubes. It is important to communicate to him, even though it's hard/you don't want to. I certainly struggle with it too! Good luck next time! :)

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    1. Yeah, I have to remember that men work differently than women do.

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  8. I am glad you can use your blog to express yourself and maybe it will lead to some good conversations for you and DH. Hugs.

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  9. Sorry i am so late, i have not been online much lately. I did not read the comments so perhaps this has been said beofre, once you get over asking the first time it becomes much much easier. Good Luck and I hope you get spanked soon.

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    1. I have asked him before, but still don't like it. Usually it just reminds him that he is not doing a good job, and I think he is, and I hate making him feel that way.

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  10. hey, ask him how he feels about you asking for a spanking. like when you're NOT already in bed and itching for one. perhaps after a romp or when you're cuddling just about to go to bed.

    it could be that he'd be relieved (more than you know) that you let him know how your'e feeling and WHEN you desire one, rather than having to guess... you nver know till you try.

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    1. He always feels like a failure at ttwd when I ask him for a spanking. SO I try to avoid that. I just realized that over the last weekend. That is why I don't like asking: I don't like making him feel bad, because I think he is doing a great job!@

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    2. ahhhh ok. i get it now. i guess in your shoes i wouldn't like to make him feel like a failure too... but hmmm let's see how we can get around it. do you know WHY he feels like he is failing you when you have to ask? after all, i'm sure he is aware you don't expect him to read your mind?

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    3. Well we both agree that we are not mind readers, but I think he feels like he should have known anyway, as in read the signs better, because I do tell him, and he knows he should be doing it soon. If that makes sense. It usually is just that life gets in the way, he is tired or whatnot....

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