Monday, July 29, 2013

When Life is out to get YOU!

Thanks for our lovely wishes for our vacation. We had a great time, even though it was very short. Once we got home, and DH went back to work however, he came home  again a few hours later, carrying all his belongings. We all know what that means, right? So here we are again. No job.

To be honest, I haven't felt like blogging lately. Well, hang on, I am sure you couldn't tell, lol.
It's just so weird at the moment in our lives. DH and I have noticed that we are doing great. The two of us are just awesome. We are very happy, we fight, we get along, we agree, we have great sex. Everything is going great within our little family. Its just all these little outside forces.

First it was him getting fired from his last job, then this "friend" exploded on me, making me consider whether I am even good at being friends. Also, some of the things she said made us question ourselves,, and even our values.
Then my step son drove DH's car into the ditch, it is still driveable, but still. Now once again, DH doesn't have work. We don't have health insurance. Meanwhile, another "friend" (who was also friends with that other friend) complained about my friendship skills. Really? DH and I have our own lives. And if what I can give as a friend isn't enough for a person, then I am just thinking don't be friends with me.


So, I don't know what is going on. Here DH and I are just trying to move out from a mountain of debt. We have been doing very well on that, and we are happy. When people see us together, we are always that couple that, still, after eleven years together, touches one another. A lot. Do people really not like people who are actually happy with their lives? Is that a red flag to some people? I think it may be. Both of those 'friends' are not happy, and I think they needed to let it out on somebody. Me.

No words of wisdom from me today. Sorry guys. But I could sure use some words of wisdom from other people....

DH has two interviews this week already. Fingers crossed please!

27 comments:

  1. Hugs sent and fingers crossed. I do think that sometimes, others who see happiness in you are jealous...and wish it was them.
    hugs abby

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  2. Hi Julia,
    I'm glad you had a lovely vacation. I have to agree with Abby about some friends being jealous. A true friend will always understand that you give to your family first and then to your friendship. I will keep my fingers crossed about the upcoming job interviews. I wish him luck!
    Hugs,
    Kim

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    1. Thank you Kim. That is how I see it too, my family first, always.

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  3. Fingers crossed for a new job for DH. A friend of ours had that happen also, just back from vacation and notice on his desk.

    There are friends and there are friends. Sometimes it takes some strife to find out who the true ones are.

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    1. Yeah that is nice, isn't it? We could have stayed another day or two too!

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  4. Damn! It almost sounds as if someone just dumped ill will all over you two. And from the "hit you while down" strikes by those two people you mentioned, this may be the case.

    In regards to people being jealous of folks who are actually happy with themselves, the answer is yes. My wife and I can attest to that. We have gotten flack, both together and seperatly, for being happy with ourselves and with our lives. It is a shame that people who have good lives have to be on guard against others who are sad in their own lives.

    Good luck to the both of you. And don't let anyone get you down.

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    1. Thanks Loki, and I agree. I am a little dumbfounded at the moment, not sure why this keeps happening. If DH and I didn't agree with each other, we would start to doubt ourselves, but we still agree. And get along. And are happy.
      It really is a shame that somebody who is happy gets treated thusly in this society.
      Thanks for leaving a comment. :)

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  5. Grrrr! Not what you want to come home to after a vacation...but it sounds like he has already got some good leads and the two of you sound solid. I don't know your friends, but it sure seems like they are coming from a place of jealousy...lashing out because of the way they may be feeling about their own relationships. Keeping my fingers crossed the the interviews go well:)

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    1. Yeah really wasn't.
      He has some leads, some from last time still.
      These friends: One of them isn't in any relationship and never really has had a real boyfriend (at 28), so I can't even talk to her about sex without her blushing. I mean, I am so passed that it is not even funny anymore.
      The other is married, and always the happiest person around. Which makes me think that she is faking it.

      Thanks Tess.

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  6. fingers and toes crossed!

    keep on being who you are. and if friends need more than you can give, or have a skewed view of what your friendship is "supposed" to be, that doesn't quite mesh with your own view of things, then maybe they didn't get it in the first place.

    I've lost some friends and my focus is always on the ones who ARE still around and happy to be with ME the way I am, and not grumbling about what about my friendship skills is lacking!

    and yes. people who aren't happy tend to put other people down just so they don't feel so bad about themselves. and if this really is what your "friends" were doing, then they don't deserve your friendship.

    *hugs*

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    1. Thanks fondles, we both appreciate the toes and fingers. :)

      And you are right, that is how I have started to look at friendships too. I mean, this is me, take it or leave it, you know?

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  7. Hang in there :) Usually when things get tough couples tend to push each other away, but you guys are leaning on each other which is amazing! as much as it hurts to have a friend question and push you away, you have to think of it as a positive, do you really need someone in your life that isn't there in a time of need? fingers crossed on the job interviews, I hope "the world" cuts you a break soon :)

    ~ Tasha

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    1. Yes, we have done that before too. Things got very hard, and DH and I started fighting like we never have before or after.
      Thanks for crossing fingers...:)

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  8. Nooooooo!!!!! Not again!!!! I'm so sorry guys!! Of course my finger, toes and eyes are crossed for you.
    As far as friends go, that's a tough one too. I agree with what everyone else said. Those aren't the kinds of friends you want or need.
    So and DH are drawing towards each other instead of pulling away.
    Hang in there.
    Hugs!!!
    Ps, even though you're having a rough time, it was still good to see you here. :)

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    1. Thanks for your kind words Sarah.

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  9. I am so, SO sorry to hear this! I wish I could something, anything that would make you two feel better. All I can say is that I hope he finds an even better job very soon...

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    1. Thanks rednakedy, we both appreciate you. We are not feeling down per ce, just off with the outside world I guess.

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  10. Aww Julia. :( I'm sorry to read this, but on the bright side, it seems things like this always bring people even closer! Even though it might not seem possible, it'll pull you two closer together in my opinion.

    Lean on each other, have fun with your family, and everything will eventually fall into place.

    I'm here if ya need to talk! :)

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    1. Yes, it does. Hard times always show you the truth. Good or bad. In our case, we have learned to make it positive. Still hard though.

      Thanks Kenzie. :)

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  11. Man that sucks, sorry to hear it. I always try and keep things in perspective when I have tough times. Almost like simplifying things, like what is really important to me and makes me happy? My kids, my wife, having my health, my wife and kids having their health, living in a safe place etc...

    The rest ends up seeming like noise.

    In terms of the friends, fuck em. But that's me. That's my attitude towards people in general, I figure I'm worth it that if people aren't going to treat me right then forget about them. I'm sure you are worth it too, so don't diminish your worth by letting them treat you poorly. If they are treating you poorly, then surround yourself with people who don't treat you poorly.

    Good luck to DH with the job, I'm sure it won't be long. And as an aside, the tone of your blog and your writing makes it very clear that you guys are very happy, you don't even need to say it. For those who have been reading and following for awhile it's clear.

    All the best.

    ~Ponyboy

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    1. PB,
      I am sitting here smiling, reading your comment. We have been looking at everything with the big picture in mind. Ultimately what will happen will happen, however, you can nudge it along the right path in my opinion. At least I really hope so. :)
      Those people are not worth mentioning anymore. Just not worth the negativity.

      DH had one interview today that he didn't like, another one coming up. we will see!

      Thanks so much, you really put a big smile on my face.

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    2. Glad to hear it, good luck to DH on the next interview, hopefully it's a good fit for him and them.

      ~PB

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  12. Ooh, good luck on the job front! As someone quite familiar with the "Mountain of debt and no work" I feel for you both.

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    1. Thanks lil. Sadly too many are still experiencing this as well...

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  13. Awe Julia, sorry I am late to this post and so sorry to hear about the job. I have my fingers and toes crossed for a good outcome from the interviews.

    I tend to agree with the others on the friendship issue. It does sound as though their actions are coming from a place of jealousy.

    Hang in there! If there is one thing the two of you have proven, it is that the hard stuff only makes you stronger as a couple.

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. Thank you Roz, that is very sweet of you.

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