Thursday, June 26, 2014

Reality bites!

I had this post all figured out this morning, and was going to call this one "Picture Friday - How to make me cum edition". I know, the title....

Well, the title came to me after yet another night of us not having sex. Again. Life can be such a drag, and ever since I have started working, I have been more tired than I used to be. All normal, I know, doesn't help though knowing that.
We have been having normal sex. You know the type I am sure (well I hope so at least), but rolling over, lazy style, me not cuming, ever, simply because we can never find a good time to actually have sex.


And still reality.

Last night, DH made a special effort to be with me, we watched a movie together, and then even fell into bed together. We lay there for a few minutes getting comfortable, but he was so hot, I knew he wouldn't want to cuddle.

"I want to give you a spanking. Come over my lap."

Hesitation on my part, then I went over. My stepson comes out of his room and goes in the backyard (our bedroom windows are overlooking the backyard). DH lifted the sheet over my bottom and started spanking me regardless, and I was really fine with it too.

After too short a time, he motioned for me to get up, his legs were sweating against my breasts and I think we were both uncomfortable in that position.
I lay back down next to him, a little disappointed. After a minute, he made a grab for between my legs, and I got twitchy (as he calls it), and basically I managed to make him stop, which was the exact opposite of what I actually wanted and so crave.

And we fell asleep.

This morning, anything would have set me off, and it really didn't matter what it was about. I got grumpier by the second, and he started to withdraw from me.

After I had (yet again) complained a tiny bit about the lack of kinky sex possibilities in our house, he grew frustrated. "I wanted to last night and you shot me down."

"No, I didn't."
He explained to me how it at least felt like it, and I admitted I was probably just playing hard to get.

He was getting more frustrated. "Don't you think that after a long day doing this and that, I can't deal with playing hard to get?" He asked me, really asking me that question.

I know all that, and still.

"I understand, but I can't help it." I admitted and suddenly I started crying, venting all of my frustrations through tears while leaning into his strong arms. After a little while, he led me to the bed and did what I had been craving for weeks now. And it was glorious!

So no Picture Friday today, instead reality. Can you relate?


  1. Oh Julia....I can relate. In just about perfect timing yesterday as well. I was COMPLETELY exhausted from work- I ached everywhere.

    He came to bed playing with me just a bit. I (slightly) played hard to get, but really it just hurt to move so I just felt him playing as I stayed mostly still. When he rolled over and asked me to rub him I honestly think I yelled "ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" He was not at all happy. He commented that I had energy to be played with.....

    I too broke down into tears but it was after he fell asleep and I was still wide awake pondering my attitude, my frustrations, my stressful day. And, I didn't wake him. =( I left the bed and just cried myself to sleep on the couch.

    We will talk tonight I am sure. It's hard to think clearly and make a better choice when you are already so overwhelmed. Bad decision on my part not to wake him up.

    I do love to read your ups an downs Julia- always so heartfelt from both of you!

    Very happy to hear how well you two connected!!

    XOXO Pearl

    1. Thank you Pearl, it is always nice to hear that I am not the only one that messes up like that.
      Hope you guys find time to talk about this soon, I know I always feel better once we are all open again.

      And thank you Pearl. xoxo

  2. Oh Julia, I can so relate to this! Its been weeks of disappointing, unsatisfying, vanilla sex here. It happens I suppose. It seems a little unfair that men can get off so easily but its oh so nice when the effort is put in and all is righted with the world again. ;-)

    So glad you two were able to reconnect in a most satisfying way!


    1. Thank you Bonnie, and I am honestly happy to hear we are not the only ones. And I am already jonesing for more effort being put in again. :D

  3. What matters is that the two of you finally related, in a terrifically wonderful way.
    hugs abby

  4. Hi Julia, I can definitely relate. So glad you two reconnected in such a glorious way :)


    1. Thanks Roz, although I am really hoping this is a start instead a patch-over, if you know what I mean, and I think you do. :D

  5. I am so glad you were able to have special time. We can all relate to life and all the ups and downs!

  6. Lovely post. I really enjoy your blog!

    1. Thank you nana7, nothing like being able to work something personal like that out loud without being judged. Thanks reading!

  7. I am so behind with reading and commenting on blogs. I did that ABC blog hop thingy and it was all that I had time to do. Really liked this post. I liked how it all ended, well that and the conversation before hand. It all made sense and I learned something about Ty and myself. Next time, I will try to not play games, frustrated and disappointed but instead communicate why I am withdrawn and not interested. I feel silly saying, thanks for the good advice but it is an eye opener. So thanks

    1. I hear you Blondie, I get to out of blogging, but at the same time miss all this and keep coming back. :)

      I am glad sharing something that personal helped somebody understand herself better, I wasn't sure it all made sense while I was writing it.

  8. What a great post, Julia. This life is hard sometimes, isn't it?

    1. Yeah, but then something so beautiful happens, it makes it all worth it. :D

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