Thursday, May 7, 2015

Back Pain and Spankings

Sounds like a fun title, doesn't it? Yeah, not really, I know, trust me. I KNOW.

I have always had back trouble, I remember being in High School, 15 years old, and sitting in those chairs in class was killing me. I would have to slide in really tight to the table to wedge myself in to make it bareable. Then it stopped. And would come back again, again, and again. I was trying to see if I could associate my pain with my period, but it wasn't that.
Later, meeting DH I was good for a while as long as I avoided certain movements, and don't even remember my first flare up with him.
But over the last few years it  has gotten a lot worse and more frequent. These bouts of throwing my back out have become more frequent, and then when I started that work-from-home job last year and starting sitting for long periods of time, it was a constant.

I have finally gone to a chiropractor and even had an x-ray taken which revealed definite damage. 

(I made it a link if anyone is interested)

It turns out spondylolisthesis is something that happens early in adolescence, or in my case when I was 8 and fell in a sitting position on a big rock. I remember I couldn't sit for weeks because of the pain of sitting.


We don't really do punishment spankings. I mean, I like the idea of it and it definitely turns me on, but then in reality it has not really been needed. Often, I am more the level-headed one, and if something gets heated its usually not because of me.... Although I still end up over his lap with a red bum. Because he needs it. It restore balance to us, he feels more confident once again, and we always end up having hot sex. 

But when my back is killing me there are no spankings. Most likely there is no sex either. 

When my back is 'only' a dull ache, we have figured out what works for us. Lying over his lap is actually a good position for me, very supported. We have figured out how high he can spank and how hard/long. If it turns out I hurt more than I thought, I will say something and stay on his lap with him just rubbing my aching lower back. Sadly, those always end too soon because DH gets distracted by my butt.....

My number one advice to anyone suffering back pain and wondering about spankings, is to pay attention to your own body! Every single person is different, and there is no one thing that will just work. You have to communicate with your partner, let him/her know where you are at. 

It is tempting sometimes to want to get out of a spanking by telling him my back hurts when it for once doesn't, but I try to be honest with him simply because he cares about me. He asks me every single day how my back is, and listens to my detailed response of how it hurts differently today. And then even remembers it the next day!  I owe him the truth in regards to spankings.

Hi, DH here! She just handed me her laptop, as she feels like her arms and shoulders are super-tired after her adjustments today.  It makes my heart hurt to see her go through all of this, but she keeps it to herself.  When Julia complains, I know the pain is really bad. :(  

I'm so glad we have an actual diagnosis for what's been going for most of her life, and I really believe that balance is key in managing a chronic condition with the lifestyle we have chosen.  When we started ttwd, part of my reluctance to give her a spanking was fear that I would hurt her.  Years later, we've both learned to accept her condition and work around it, so that her back isn't aggravated and we still get to live the way to want to without using backpain as an excuse not to.



  1. I'm so glad you have an answer to your back pain Julia. I'm sorry you are dealing with this and hope you will also now find solutions to help manage the pain now you have a diagnosis. Great advice to others ... listen to your body.


    1. Roz,

      I was actually excited when he told me he knows what is going on. Finally some answers! Then he showed me a video, and I started crying. Seeing exactly everything that has slowly been draining me was such a relief.

  2. I hope you get some help for that back now you have a diagnosis. I have trapped nerves in my coccyx, which gives me sciatic, but not badly. I don't think spanking makes it worse, but I doubt it makes it better either!

    1. Thanks DF, you know what I am talking about then. :)

  3. Frustrating I am sure but helpful to know the "why". Hopefully this flair up is short lived!!

    1. Pearl,

      I am actually went to the chiropractor even though it wasn't flaring up at the moment, and still he was and is able to help. I have gone to an MD before and was told that I am getting older and so are my 25.

  4. Back pain is horrible, and it really sucks when your tailbone hurts along with it. I've had that but luckily it's only been for short periods. I'm glad you know what it is now that's bothering you, I just wish you didn't have to go thru all that pain. And your DH is such a good guy!

    1. Hi Maggie,

      Yes back pain really is horrible, although this past summer I had sciatica and it felt like a toothache running along my entire lower right side. Awful....
      And you are totally right, he is amazing.

  5. So glad you're getting relief!! I'm a Feldenkrais practitioner and I help a ton of people with back trouble avoid surgeries, etc. I know what a difference it can make to be out of pain!

    1. So far I can avoid surgeries, but seeing my x-ray for the first time, I realized I may just have to at some point. :)

      Any exercises you can recommend?

  6. Just got my check for $500.

    Many times people don't believe me when I tell them about how much you can get by taking paid surveys online...

    So I took a video of myself getting paid over $500 for doing paid surveys.


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